Testing the Limits

Days 3,4 & 5:
The title of this post is "Testing the Limits" as I believe it is fitting of days 3,4 & 5 in Addis Ababa.

Samuel woke up with an eye infection which required a prescription for eye drops. Thankfully one of the Gladney care givers had a supply. The price tag on the prescription read $2.76. I couldn't believe how inexpensive it was! Although we were appreciative of the prescription, Samuel was not a fan. He kept saying, "No, No...Coy (which means wait)." He believed he should put the drops in himself - so we let him...at least let him believe he was doing it by himself as I gave his hand a little push in the right direction.

Our morning progressed with a coffee ceremony at the Gladney Care Center. A young woman roasted the coffee beans, grinded them by hand, and the brewed the coffee for us. The coffee was served with popcorn, as tradition in Ethiopia. Samuel loved the popcorn...in fact we found that Samuel loved food...lots of food...all the time.

We spent an evening at a traditional Ethiopian restaurant surrounded by locals and Ethiopian dancers. While Todd and I were not adventurous enough to consume much of our meal, Samuel devoured it; as soon as the plate was set in front of him, he dug right on in and helped himself. He watched the dancers carefully, mimicking their isolated movements; he laughed, he ate, he danced and smiled the entire evening.

The next day we ate lunch and went swimming at the Hilton. I ordered a diet coke, as they are not available everywhere and when the bill came I realized it cost me 50 birr - 5 U.S. dollars. I couldn't believe it; it wasn't even the same diet coke found at home as it was called, "Coke Light" and tasted much like watered down coke.

We prepared for swimming and it became quite obvious to us that he had never been in a swimming pool before as he squirmed and seemed unsure about what you were supposed to do in a pool of water. He splashed around and seemed quite content to simply sit in the hot springs water. Of course, he wanted me to take his picture the entire time as he loves having his picture taken.

When Samuel got out of the water, he became irritated with me as I dressed him. I couldn't figure out why he was so dismayed but I later learned that he did not want to wear the clothes he had arrived in - instead, he wanted to wear the traditional Ethiopian outfit we had purchased earlier in the day. In fact, not only did he beg me that afternoon, but he continued begging that night. I ended up hiding the outfit as I wanted to keep it clean for a future baptism ceremony, but he located it and became quite obsessed.

The next morning I let him wear it for 2 hours before breakfast. I cannot describe how proud he was and how he looked as he stared himself in the mirror. When I requested for him to take it off, he was a little upset, but he folded it neatly and tucked it away in the suitcase with great care. Apparently these outfits are coveted by the children and it means a lot to them to have such clothing. I decided then that we better purchase a play outfit before leaving.

We continued to take in the city and learned a few norms about Addis:

1) Men hold hands and link arms while walking down the street as a display of friendship and brotherhood
2) It is acceptable for Ethiopians to pick their noses in public and for men to urinate in public; I was taken back the first time we passed a man urinating on the street
3) It is also acceptable to throw trash down on the ground and out the window; we quickly explained to Samuel that he could not do such things in America and must learn to use a trash can
4) Toilet paper is not flushed, nor is it readily available in restrooms - you must bring your own supply with you at all times
5) Villages all take turns forgoing electricity in order to take part of conservation efforts. From 8 - 8 we lived by a kerosene lamp
6) If it rains, it is not unusual to lose electricity or water - therefore, we actually became part of a 2 day conservation effort


The city is poor and there are people everywhere. I am amazed by their optimism and graciousness as they do without all the amenities that we Americans could not fathom forgoing. As we bartered in the city for souvenirs, I felt guilty for receiving such bargains. Our driver was quick to tell us what items were overpriced and he did a lot of talking on our behalf. Part of me just wanted to throw the birr down on the counter and take the first price given us, but our driver was insistent we get the best deal.

The most challenging part of this experience was mealtime. Meals take an extremely long time and Samuel usually is in need of a nap by then. Our routine becomes:
1) Order food
2) Tell Samuel not to play with knives as he runs around the restaurant waving it in the air
3) Samuel throws a fit because he is hungry and wants starts to do something else inappropriate like throw his cars or act like a maniac saying he doesn't want what we've ordered even though he told us he wanted it
4) I tell Samuel "No" and correct his behavior; I remove the food as he keeps pushing it away
5) Samuel starts to whimper, then cry and will not stop
6) Every Ethiopian in the restaurant begins to stare and then they come over and offer him food, crackers, bread etc..
7) I become furious because I want them to stop appeasing his misbehavior and I want to prove that he will eat what is served, or he will go hungry
8) We end up walking out into the alley to have a Come to Jesus meeting
9) The driver comes to get us; I take Samuel's food in a bag to the car. Samuel says, "I'm hungry" and I then serve him his food out of a bag - no utensils and he is forced to eat pasta with his hands

We keep trying to use Love and Logic - always giving 2 choices but it is difficult. I keep reminding myself that my aim is to produce a "good and productive citizen" and that eventually Love and Logic will pay off. And, several meals later, as we sit down and silverware is placed in front of Samuel, I realize it has paid off when Samuel immediately takes the knife and he places it down in front of me - out of his reach. Ahhh....I remind myself to celebrate the little things.